Lose 40 Pounds in 80 Days
> AND IN CONCLUSIONI can put my overcoat on without the help of my friends. I can tie and untie my shoelaces any old time I want to!
I can cross my legs, and I do it often. I like the feeling. Insurance men are hounding me once more, which is a healthy sign, and occasionally a girl turns around when old Trim Boy Elmer struts by. (Maybe she thinks she knows me! Or maybe she's a friend of the wife.)
The Fat Boy, I find, is as old-fashioned as mustache cups.
I like my "new look."
My shirts fit loosely again, in current fashion, like the Arrow boys look in the ads; and that long-legged fellow in the Hart Schaffner ads smiles at me again.
He knows I'm a prospect once more for clothes. Trim boys buy three suits to every one Fatty buys. The trimmer you are, it seems, the more you like to strut around in fine feathers!
Yes, as Socrates said, "Nothing in excess." I am no longer in "excess."
Now when somebody tells me that Arthur Brisbane once said, "Half of what we eat keeps us alive, and the other half kills us," I can agree without getting a sickly smile on my face.
It's good to be a Thin Boy, all right. It's good to be down to 186 lbs.
No longer do theater managers worry when I stand up for fear the seat will come up with me.
Nor do my friends worry when I sit down at their tables for fear they haven't enough food to fill up Old Hollow Leg - or that I'll cave in their antique chairs.
I like the glamor of my "new look."
I can wear double-breasted suits again. With plenty of glen plaids and checks. No more plain dark colors to hide my shape.
I can wear belts again. No need for suspenders any more. I'm back in the bow tie business - they don't get lost under my double chin any more - and I can go swimming once more and not feel ashamed and hide behind a towel!
I'm happy with my "new look."
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